[delay +1 week]
1. When the Lidl app pops up saying the new coupons are available.
2. Completing my taxes on time.
3. Getting to the bottom of the washing basket (who am I kidding, this never happens… there are always more clothes to wash).
4. It being Friday so I can have a bath… Why do we love baths so much when we are kids!? Cats hate them. Thereby proving that cats aren’t human children, and vice versa.
5. Picking up the magazine in Lidl on the way out (”I’ll be back for all the cool things in here!).
6. Finding £20 in a drawer that I had forgotten about.
7. Getting a ‘’no strings” £1.50 coupon from Tesco through the door instead of their shitty “£2 if you spend £40” fuck you Tesco! Lidl gives me a free cookie on my birthday just for being me! You didn’t know that? Put your birthday in the Lidl app! Or whatever day of the year you prefer to eat cookies. I’m hoping on my 40th birthday they’ll give me a free lawnmower.